A Dose of Levity

Voted Best Joke of the Year in Australia

Kiwi walks into his bedroom with a sheep under his arm and says: "Darling, this is the pig I have sex with when you have a headache."

His boyfriend is lying in bed and replies: "I think you'll find that's a sheep, you idiot."

The Kiwi says: "I think you'll find I wasn't talking to you."

Just a Great Joke

A young man moved into a new apartment and went to the lobby to put his name on his mailbox.

While there, a hot slightly older guy came out of the apartment next to the mailboxes, wearing only a robe. The guy smiled at the young man and started a conversation with him. As they talked, his robe slipped open, and it was obvious that he had nothing else on.

The young man broke into a sweat and tried to maintain eye contact. After a few minutes, the older guy placed his hand on the young man's arm and said, 'Let's go to my apartment, ... I hear someone coming.'

The young man followed him into his apartment. The older guy closed the door and leaned against it, allowing the robe to fall off completely. Now nude, he asked, 'What would you say is my best feature?'

Flustered and embarrassed, the young guy finally squeaked 'It's got to be your ears.'

Astounded and a little hurt, the older guy said 'My ears? Look at these pecs; they are pumped and firm. I work out every day and my butt is real solid. Look at my skin - no blemishes anywhere. How can you think that the best part of my body is my ears?'

Clearing his throat, he stammered 'Outside, when you said you heard someone coming ... that was me!

Jacques-Henri Lartigue (1894-1986) - A Great 'Amateur'

Jacques-Henri Lartigue trained as a painter, and practised photography as an amateur, something that gave his images a certain freedom from both professional constraints and their often accompanying (and self-conscious) 'artistic' considerations. As a result, his photographs often have something of the quality of snapshots - playful, immediate, uncalculated, unpolished, often less than structured and of the moment.

He was 'discovered' in the 1960's - at the age of 69.

Lartigue was obviously fascinated by many of the themes and obsessions of the various ages during which he took his pictures. And dabbled with a range of styles of the day, selecting what he felt would best reveal the essences of any subject he was dealing with.

So techniques to demonstrate speed and movement in the 1910's and 1920's.

In the opening image, there is the 'leaning' of the racing car to the right with the distortion of the wheels in the same direction, and the 'tilt' of the spectators in the other direction communicating that they are speedily being past by.

Blurring was also commonly used to communicate speed. And frozen moment techniques as a counterpoint to action.






He was often asked how he achieved the second last image above. And would reply 'I just asked her to jump!'.

Lartigue was also drawn to capturing the fashionable and social world.





I particularly love informal quality of the last photo of John Szarkowski, created by its seemingly accidental partial decapitation.

And admire the almost purely formal qualities of the second last image, reminiscent of some of the images of Aubrey Beardsley where the design almost overwhelms the representation, such as in 'The Peacock Cape'.


There were his images in a commercial mode - you see them as you would turn the pages of a magazine of the 20's, 30's, 40's or 50's.






And there were the purely quirky and most 'unprofessional' works - you can just imagine finding these in an old family album recently discovered in the attic.

1904

Dad was so cute as a kid. And what a funny old thing Great Uncle Cyril was!

Finally, a great landscape ...


... that by its composition and placement of the camera in relation to the sunlight has almost been abstracted out of representation.

Eva Cassidy (1963-1996) - 'One of the Greatest Voices of her Generation' (The Guardian)

Eva Cassidy's world-wide recognition has occurred since her death from cancer at the age of 33, with posthumously released recordings selling in the millions.

This native of Washington, DC makes a song (be it jazz, blues, folk, gospel or pop) sound as though you are hearing it for the very first time. Nothing more needs to be said - the performances carry it all.

So 'Autumn Leaves' ...



... and 'Tall Trees in Georgia' ...



... and finally 'Over the Rainbow'



Arrangements that are in themselves so right.

And the performances, unrushed, gentle and so sweet. What a fucking loss! Bugger.

Marlene Dietrich - 'Where Have All the Flowers Gone?'

As a kid, I was extraordinarily lucky to meet Marlene Dietrich. It was in London in 1972, and through a family friend, Dorothy Cole, an administrator at Covent Garden Opera House.

It was at a post-concert 'party' in the Green Room of the Queen's Theatre - one of those affairs where the famous are required to 'press the flesh' when I'm sure (now) they'd much have preferred to have been at home in slippers with a cup of hot chocolate in hand. Still have the program!

This clip is of Dietrich performing a great anti-war protest song by Pete Seeger. In a Royal Command Performance in 1963. A great musical choice for Dietrich.



I love the way she subtly builds the expression anger over the circular journey of the song - through the repeated asking of a (rephrased) question - 'Where have all the flowers/the young girls/the young men/the soldiers/the graveyards gone?'. With the answer leading and linking into the next question - 'Young girls pick them every one. When will they ever learn?' and so 'Where have all the young girls gone?'. The final question and answer being 'Where have all the graveyards gone? Gone to flower every one'. Taking us back to the beginning! With the powerful symbolism.

I remember thinking at the time that the Dietrich persona had a synergic effect on the meanings in the song.

Cesaria Evora - 'Morna', the Music of Cape Verde

Cesaria Evora is from the former slave port of Cape Verde, an island off the coast of Senegal. A singer of Creole-Portuguese morna, a soulful, nostalgic and melancholic genre that fuses Latin jazz and Afro beats with traces of Portuguese fado and Brazilian modinha (ballads). Music of loving, longing and departure.



She began singing barefoot in bars in her island home, gave up performing to support her family for ten years and finally gained international recognition later in life, a success that proceeded from concerts in Paris in 1988. Winning a Grammy - as though the ultimate accolade.

Now in her seventies, Cesaria's visiting Sydney for concerts in March, 2008. Yippie!!!

Grace Jones - 'La Vie en Rose'

A knock-out disco version of 'La Vie en Rose' by Grace Jones - originally from Edith Piaf and by way of Marlene Dietrich.

What's totally FAB about this clip, apart from the music, is the accompanying surreal and artistic feast. Full of references from fine and pop art and fun ideas pillaged from glossy fashion magazines.



A perfect fusion of music and visual. Enhanced by Grace making visible the pulse of the music in the undulations of her body.

A few years back, Grace Jones performed at the Mardi Gras Dance Party here in Sydney - I remember dancing with a cute boy as she did 'La Vie en Rose' at midnight and the sprinkler system went off - due to the heat of ALL the cute boys around?! One of those great moments.

Joni Mitchell - 'Both Sides Now'

I've known of Joni Mitchell for a long time. Who hasn't.

But I've only appreciated her real greatness lately - I think it's caught in her new 'Both Sides Now', one of my now all-time favorite songs.

It's her unmannered directness that makes such powerful expression - in some way, nothing gets in the way of her communicating the meanings of words. Joni is only concerned with the ideas in the lyrics - rather than the song being a vehicle to display the ego of a star. She has something of real and permanent value to say.

Both Sides Now

Rows and floes of angel hair
And ice cream castles in the air
And feather canyons everywhere
I've looked at clouds that way

But now they only block the sun
They rain and they snow on everyone
So many things I would have done
But clouds got in my way

I've looked at clouds from both sides now
From up and down, and still somehow
It's cloud illusions I recall
I really don't know clouds at all

Moons and Junes and Ferris wheels
The dizzy dancing way that you feel
As every fairy tale comes real
I've looked at love that way

But now it's just another show
And you leave 'em laughing when you go
And if you care, don't let them know
Don't give yourself away

I've looked at love from both sides now
From give and take, and still somehow
It's love's illusions that I recall
I really don't know love
I really don't know love at all

Tears and fears and feeling proud
To say I love you right out loud
Dreams and schemes and circus crowds
I've looked at life that way

Oh but now old friends they are acting strange
And they shake their heads and they tell me that I've changed
Well something's lost, but something's gained
In living every day

I've looked at life from both sides now
From win and lose and still somehow
It's life's illusions I recall
I really don't know life at all

It's life's illusions that I recall
I really don't know life
I really don't know life at all

I love the unaffectedness of Joni's interaction with the audience at the end of the performance! It has the intimacy of equal friendship - and it really touched me.

Particularly after the humility of the song's meanings - the realization of one's limited understandings of life, even after having a lifetime of experience.

A true artist.